letters to nikhil: eighteen months

Dear Nikhil,

How on earth are you already eighteen months, my love?!?!  

I think it is harder in some ways to watch our second little love grow up.  Maybe because we know just how sweet and fast each stage of life you are going through is, and we want to savor every little moment.

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In the past six months, some wonderful changes happened to our family.  All leading up to the point in time where I am blessed to spend every day with you, my sweet, little sidekick.  I am still adjusting to our new normal, but I know it will not be long until you join Noah at “big boy” school.  Until then, I am going to embrace this precious time I have been given with you.  Because, sweets, it has been the absolute BEST!  

I have felt nothing short of joy being able to watch you explore, learn, and love (and work through the frustrating times as well).  Perhaps it is because I get the honor of seeing all of your small and big moments that makes everything feel a little sweeter the second time.  Or maybe, I am learning to let go a little more the second time around.  Either way, nothing beats seeing the wheels turn in your head as you create a plan to get the chairs lined up to reach a toy up high or discover how to make the blocks balance into a tall tower.  You continue to change and grow rapidly.

For starters, you have actually grown a few inches both vertically and horizontally.  We have a hard time of transitioning out clothes that fit you.  (I have a sneaky suspicion it will not be long until you are as tall as me!)  You share the same love for food as I do, and I LOVE it!  I do not think we have found a food group you dislike yet.  But, I will say, apples and blueberries to you are what a bundt cake is to me-the best kind of treat.  To say you love them is an understatement.  And, do not even get me started on milk.  With a straw.  Oh you are one silly kid.

I believe food and sleep are top equal to you.  You are what we refer to as a dream babe when it comes to sleep.  I have concluded that you most definitely inherited the Lindsey gene.  I speak for your father when I say, we BOTH appreciate your love to get a good night’s rest with a side of sleeping in on the weekends.  Waking up to you jumping and laughing in your crib is the cherry on top.

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We cannot get over how brilliant you are, little love.  One of my favorite moments in staying home with you is the chance to watch you soak up what you learn with excitement in your eyes.  Puzzles, repeating the alphabet, and anything to do with colors and numbers have become a few of your favorite learning moments.  And, when you get the treat of watching a show, like your big brother, you love anything that has to do with the farm and tractors; my country boys at heart!  (Your daddy could not be more proud!)

What is most astounding to us is how much you are talking.  The other night, you said “I love you” to daddy and I.  And, I believe our hearts were a puddle within seconds.  It was all we could do to make you say it again.  The best is when you ask for “help” and “please” for more milk.  I could listen to you talk all day especially when you try and have conversations with Noah.  It is definitely the sweetest thing.  

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Speaking of which, watching Noah and you play together, oh my heart, it melts us.  Nik, we hope you know how deeply you are loved by your big brother.  He is the first person who comes racing to your room each morning when you wake up and the one who never, ever forgets to kiss you good night.  You may fight from time to time over a toy or for breaking down one of his creations, but he just adores you.  And, seeing how much you look up to him, well it gets me choked up every time.  Anything he does, you are right next to him, doing the same, martial arts exercises, playing soccer, and killer dance moves.  When you get the chance to play Legos with him, you have a smile that is stretched from ear to ear.  And, you never pass the chance to love on your big brother.  Noah makes you laugh more than any one of us, and he is the one you listen to the best.  Our hope for Noah and you is the two of you always remain each other’s confidant, protector, and most of all, brothers who are best friends.

Can we take a moment to talk about your personality?!  Oh Nik, it is BIG!  You are too fun to be around.  We have loved watching you become animated in everything you do whether it be at the dinner table making all of us laugh with your silly faces and giggles, reading a book outloud to Pebbles, or playing superheroes with Noah around the house.  And, you are fearless.  As in I have found you on top of the ledge of our couch attempting to balance on one foot, on our coffee table trying to head dive onto our wooden floors, and trying to climb down stairs like a big boy wearing the most bravest of faces.  In a way, I love how much courage you have!  It will take you so far in your life when you live out those big, crazy dreams.   

I tell your daddy how God made you out of honey and marshmallows with a little cinnamon spice on top.  You are by far the sweetest blessing to be given to this family.  You add more chaos, but it is the kind of chaos we love, the kind of chaos we are extra grateful for each night.  Last year was a hard year for me.  And, your sweet little self gave me so much goodness in many different moments when I needed it the most.  I constantly thank God that you were my saving grace, my little gift that helped me through a difficult time.  You were my inspiration to simplify our lives, find balance in my career that allows me to prioritize my three best people (and sweet Pebs) at the top of the list, and love BIG.  Life without you is truly unimaginable, Nikhil.

I am excited for many more adventures with you and to see how much you grow and change in the next six months.  However, for the sake of your mama and daddy’s heart, please do not grow up too fast!  

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We love you to the moon and stars and back, my sweet Nik.



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